Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria — Understanding, Hope & Healing

Part 1 of 2 

by Jeremy Rochford TI-CLC, C-MHC, C-YMHC

What do we want?

A BLOG ABOUT REJECTION SENSITIVITY DYSPHORIA!!!!

When do we want it?

NOW!!!!!!!

When will we get it?

See, that’s the problem. I’m not quite sure.

On one hand, if I write a blog and you don’t like it, then it proves my writing has been a waste of time. But if I do write it, and you happen to enjoy it, then that means everything else I write must be as agreeable. But, on the other hand, if I don’t write the blog on a topic you’re curios about, then you’ll think I’m a selfish slacker who doesn’t even care about my audience.

What to do?

What to do, what to do, what to do?

Now, if you think that escalate quickly and that, perhaps, I’m overreacting. You’re right. Or, at least by your standards. To me, and the many of us who struggle with Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (“RSD” for short), my reaction isn’t just common, it’s painfully consistent. Day by day, hour by hour, and sometimes even minute by minute, for those of us who struggle with RSD- one word, one glance, or even one unanswered text can send our brain into a downward spiral of guilt, shame, panic, or paranoia. And yet to everyone else on the outside, it looked like nothing even happened.

Welcome to Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD): a term that sounds clinical but describes something deeply human. It’s the experience of feeling a rejection so hard that it can hijack your thoughts, derail your emotions, and make even small moments feel enormous.

So, What is RSD Anyways?

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) is a neurological and emotional response where the perceived or real experience of rejection or criticism triggers an intense emotional reaction—often out of proportion to what actually happened.

This isn’t about being “too sensitive.” It’s about how our brain processes. If this is starting to sound familiar, it’s important to note that you, or the one(s) you’re loving through RSD, are not broken. You’re/they’re not overreacting. You’re/they’re just wired in a way that feels everything… deeply. And that depth, when understood, can become a gift instead of a burden.

So, as we’re starting to put together the pieces of what RSD is, let’s take a moment to discuss what it isn’t.

RSD is not being dramatic.

RSD is not being immature.

And RSD it’s not a cry for attention.

It’s none of those things because while that might be the perception from the outside, what we’re feeling on the inside is like a wave of shame, panic or anger—like our nervous system is trying to protect us from something invisible, but very real. Someone with RSD isn’t trying to overreact, be “too emotional,” or “thin-skinned,” —we’re trying to survive a moment that feels neurologically like danger. And while this might all seem like doom and gloom, the good news is that RSD isn’t a permanent identity—it’s a response pattern, not our personality.

Knowing all of this…

Who’s Most Susceptible?

Typically, those with ADHD or those who are on the Autism spectrum. However, one might also experience RSD if you’ve/they’ve carried early experiences of rejection, criticism, or abandonment. Or if you’re/they’re someone who tries hard to please, to perform, to be perfect, over works or is quick to shut down when criticized. While it may look different for everyone, the theme is typically the same: “If I’m rejected, I’m unsafe.” And that’s not a flaw—it’s a pattern shaped by wiring, experience, and the universal human need to

belong.

If you'd like to connect further about what you've just read or to learn more about what we do at NeuroFam, you can reach me at Jeremy@NeuroFam.com 

Want to hear Jeremy share his personal story with RSD? https://podcasts.apple.com/no/podcast/the-science-of-rejection-sensitivity-a/id1743989489?i=1000730716944